1. |
maybe
03:05
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Maybe if I'd thrown my cares away and kissed you on fall break
Maybe if I thought you felt the same, I'd tell you everything
Maybe if I'd been the kind of guy who thought of how you felt
Then maybe we might be in love
Maybe if my eyes had been on you and not the Milky Way
Maybe if I had the balls to ask you on a dinner date
Maybe if I hadn't just neglected you all Christmas break
Then maybe we might be in love
Maybe if I hadn't fooled around through the entire spring
And left you by yourself in search of ways to fill the emptiness
Instead of talking to the coolest girl I'd ever met
Well then maybe we might be in love
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2. |
awake
03:36
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When my eyes couldn't sleep
My mind was up on its feet
'Cause I was writing songs about the girls who think I'm not that great
I stayed awake all night to talk to you
When I'd go through my day
My eyelids twenty pound weights
Get home and tell myself to go to bed and not stay up too late
I stayed awake all night to talk to you
I took you back to my place
You sang soprano, me bass
You nursed a big ol' glass of whiskey til you were red in the face
I stayed awake all night to talk to you
Downloaded movies online
Watched with your head against mine
We didn't realize the time until the sun shone through the blinds
I stayed awake all night to talk to you
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3. |
||||
il faut que la jeunesse se passe
youth must have its fling
I know that you are happy, and well,
I'm not unhappy
I see shows, I tune pianos,
and I've kept from smoking dope
I know we can't try again
what we had back then
i just think we'd both be better now
than when we tried the first time
when I saw you in the lobby,
I was glad, so glad to see you
doing well with all your friends
in the life you made without me
it's just back when I was nineteen
I had felt so damn sedated
so I gave my life a push
just to see where I would take it
so I left in the night
I hit the bar, stayed with a friend,
lived with my mom and I learned how to drink
and how to almost die
and how to be so happy
to be feeling so blue
how to make my life exciting
without needing you
and now I see you in Ohio
and you look so happy
with your friends by your side
they're the people who replaced me in your life
and that's fine
I'm just thankful you've forgiven me
for hurting you so much
and that we can still have conversations
I never finished reading "The Death of Ivan Ilyich"
but I liked the part where Tolstoy said,
"Il faut que la jeunesse se passe:
youth must have its fling"
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4. |
stone
04:01
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bright and imperfect
inside my brown spring coat
eyes like a statue
while mine still try showing some light
when I look into your eyes of stone they look right through
I just want to tell a joke and hear the marble crack
right through your pupils
why don't I love you?
why can't I seem to find a part of me that cares?
you think it's special
you won't know where to go when we fall through
I call out, "hey, follow me" and run across the hill
bounding up the incline, you refuse to feel the chill
I should just listen
but when you approach me, you say, "hey, here's the thing
you know that I love you but my heart needs to sing
I sure wish you well, but my sould needs me to move right on
before we are both creatures of stone."
when you walk away, I see your heart begin to melt
I call out, "hey thank you" and I feel mine crack in two
as I wave goodbye to you
as I sit and fall right through
as I sit in silence anew
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5. |
it's been a year
01:14
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last night I dreamt that I was fine
but when i went to the doctor
put a needle in my vein and checked my blood
we waited in that little waiting room
for the doctor to come in
and say that I was doing fine and we could just go home
but when she opened the door and said,
"I've got some bad news for you,"
I looked at my mom and saw her heart drop to the floor
the doctor said, "it's not the worst thing that could happen,
you've just got too many white blood cells again.
we'll have to up your dose."
and on the car ride home we were silent
we were both thinking, "god, what if?"
but then I woke up in my bed again,
"this was a dream, it'll be fine."
it has been a year since I was diagnosed with cancer of the blood
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6. |
number fourteen
03:33
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is what i want even real
why can't it be real
why would i want something real
why can't i want something real
does it even exist
do you really wanna be number fourteen?
i've got nothing to be
you're as lonely as me
flip the switch, another drink
laugh and kiss and now a wink
will you go home with me, and she says
do you really wanna be number fourteen?
what am i looking for
what are you looking for
how can i know what i'm looking for
if you don't know what you're looking for
do you really wanna be number fourteen?
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7. |
underwear
02:50
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yesterday, my underwear was suddenly too big
i went to go put on a pair but it just wouldn't fit
the waistbands all had stretched out and I could not fit in
I wish that I could wear all of my favorite underwear
this weekend I will have to go to the grocery store
or the department store, or any other kind of store
that sells underwear that I can fit into
because my underwear will not fit on me
how'd my underwear stretch out so suddenly, so quick
before yesterday, I'd never even noticed it
did I wash it stupidly or do something to it
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8. |
imagined heat
04:14
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let's just read little
stories about the start of
your new design job
we visit speedway
to get a slush. we're past the
part where I'm nervous
so I hold your hand -
your pulse used to increase when
our fingers would touch
your pulse relaxes
now to weave our fingers on
the side of the road
when we get our drink,
you urge me not to drink too
quickly, but too late
you always were more
careful about brainfreezes -
but you understand
that trick to put your
tongue on the roof of your mouth
is fun with your help
so we sip the drink
and walk home in the darkness
from the gas station
by the time we get
home, the drink has melted and
your laugh is crystal
it is clear and it
is piercing - straight through my mind
i have no think time
emotions rush - I
can't help but to pull you close
the bus stop man looks
but I look straight at
him while we kiss in the moon
a great wheel of cheese
you break off a chunk
with your butter knife hand - it
is offered to the mouse
I scrape off a bit
with my grater cheeks - to dust
on his pasta hat
he never saw it
coming, and neither did we.
starting a cheese fight
but he didn't know
that we both love gouda, so
his attacks were moot
we just ate the cheese
and laughed all the way home, past
the asian market
and when I get back,
you return to memory.
it's too bad I left.
your imagined heat
is a constant reminder
that life is worth it
tweeted during #haikupowerhour on 1/20/17
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9. |
Come On Donald
03:49
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Andrew Kovaleski Columbus, Ohio
Experimental saxophone music, bedroom pop music about lizards, and some other things.
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