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Days are getting short but my eyes are brighter
It's been so long since I've not been so bitter
It feels like I've lost entire years to something so devoid
Why's it been so long since I wrote a love song?
Looking in your eyes I can't find the answer
Instead I found something that I had misplaced for too long
When my arm's around you my heart's on fire
Before we met I felt like a flat tire
I don't know how I spent so long by myself
Like I just resigned my whole life to the shelf
I was sleeping like the dead
Waking up finally from depressed comfort
Is like getting drunk without the hangover
It's not healthy to hate myself, even just for songs
Keeping warm together under the covers
Every time we kiss I just want another
Sometimes it's hard not to cringe at the shit I write
Your face is the place where I cease to suffer
The closer I get my breathing gets tougher
I don't know how I spent so long by myself
Like I just resigned my whole life to the shelf
I was sleeping like the dead
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2. |
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Well I know what you're gonna say
I'd know this conversation from miles away
As you ask if I'm okay
You reach for my hand, but I know that it's fake
And I should have guessed last night
You didn't say a thing when you turned out the light
Well if that's what you want, at least spare me the lies
Just don't try to cry with that look in your eyes
That's that, you head for the door
I motion the bartender for a few more
And I scoff that I won't miss you
I wanna say good riddance, but what's the use
And you turn one last time
As the door creaks closed to cover up your goodbye
Is that what it sounds like when someone's love dies?
Please don't try to cry with that look in your eyes
Is this where I lament
With bullshit like how our love was heaven sent
And the time that we spent
Meant anything more than just you paying rent for my love
For a while, 'til you found something better that suited your style
Then you turned in your notice with no who's or why's
So don't try to cry with that look in your eyes
Did you plan this all along?
I bet you even knew that I'd write this song
And I'm sure you've long since left town
So your reputation won't get around
If I'd known all along, would you've spared me the lies
And not tried to cry with that look in your eyes?
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3. |
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Sometimes it's hard to talk to someone new when you're not drunk
But then it's also hard to not make an ass of yourself and flunk
I saw her sitting in the corner by herself as we locked eyes
So I thought I'd get prepared but I was in for a surprise
So get me a drink, get me a drink and let's get this night going all wrong
'Cause I'd rather it be blackout than too long
Now my head's in the sink and all I can think is I'm really fucking this one up
'Cause getting too drunk isn't gonna help you fall in love
Whiskey-dicked one night stand with a manic pixie dream girl getting me down
So I thought I'd sneak back to the bar without making a sound
That's where I saw her dancing to the band on stage all by herself
I thought I made a good impression but in hindsight I can't tell
I said get me a drink, get me a drink and let's get this night going all wrong
'Cause I'd rather it be blackout than too long
Now my head's in the sink and all I can think is I'm really fucking this one up
'Cause getting too drunk isn't gonna help you fall in love
I contemplated giving up as I sat down and filled my cup
Then I saw a couple there barely holding each other up
They stumbled cheerfully out the door shitfaced into the night
And I couldn't help but smile and envy such a lovely sight
So get me a drink, get me a drink and let's get this night going all wrong
'Cause I'd rather it be blackout than too long
Forget what I said, what the hell 'cause there's no formula for finding love
So getting too drunk just might help you to fall in love
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4. |
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Hey! I'm not a man (x2)
Well I'm a goblin, not a man
I'll never be the things you can, I'm not a man
The not a man blues
Hey! I'm huffing grease (x2)
I snuck into a Wendy's after hours and I'm huffing all the grease they left behind
That's right, I'm not a man
The not a man blues
Hey! I like your dad
Hey! I like your dad (Sweet baby gherkins!)
I got your dad's screenname on AOL Instant Messenger and we're meeting up tonight
I'm not a man
(Luther Brimford's hambone solo)
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5. |
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So our time is laid to rest
As I fail to pass the test
It was plain to see I guess
It's easy to say, and easier to throw away
Where to from here, my dear?
Now I smoke until the night
Fades away to morning light
Though I know I won't sleep, I'll try
But don't we all sometimes pretend that we're alright
Where to from here, my dear?
I ride the clouds away
And then I fall with rain
The tears I held at bay
Will now become a stain
Where to from here, my dear?
I start to lose my voice
As I sink into the void
My song turns to noise
The blurring of a Polaroid
Where to from here, my dear?
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6. |
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I'm the kind of guy with a toothbrush comb
18-pack of PBR and a GI Joe
People try to write me but nobody is home
Always getting dressed up with no place to go
But you know what the other guys'll say
"He's the one who has to pay
when he tries to use the phone."
I've got vegan sausage and so do you
Don't you try to turn this to a 2v2
When you talk that way,
You know I can't contain my love for you
What is the appeal of a spray on tan?
Why'd I masquerade as a middle-aged man?
Who became the king with the fruit in their hands, and
Where's my next meal? In the garbage can
Cause you know what the other folks'll do
They'll all try to eat it, too,
When you take them by the hand and say
I've got vegan sausage and so do you
Don't you try to turn this to a 2v2
When you talk that way,
You know I can't contain my love for you
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7. |
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We're all drifting away and we don't know how far
Man, are you tryna stay, or should I go pack the car?
You've got nothing to say to me about where we are
Are you still tryna play, I wish you'd just do your part
All my insides are gray, and all the buildings are bars
All the movie stars paid, and all my dudes in the dark
Mow my lawn every day, but now the engine won't start
But when I look at your face, we hear the bump from my heart
I'm the guy who looks at the moon and sees a man in a mask
Tryna do what he's gotta do
When I take a walk 'round my room, I see an intricate mess
But I'm gonna be there for you
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8. |
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Watch your face touch the afghan
Now I'm on a ten foot raft and
All my thoughts are back on you
Your liquid eyes, I sink right through
Now I'm sinking and I don't care,
You're a river, loose your hair
When the poets think back to you
Your liquid eyes will be their muse
Try to race me through the past when
My poor ship had a mast and
Now I'm weathered through and through
But your liquid eyes bring me to you
Now we're singing through the fair
Everybody watch me stare
But all the poets look at your
Your liquid eyes will be our muse
Now I'm sinking and I don't care,
You're a river, loose your hair
When the poets think back to you
Your liquid eyes will be their muse
Now we're singing through the fair
Everybody watch me stare
But all the poets look at your
Your liquid eyes will be our muse
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9. |
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Loch Ness Monster in a neon suit
What's the point in even telling you about
My guy with the crayon skin
Big banana shorts with his shirt tucked in
He didn't have much to say
But he said it anyways
Why didn't sneaker boy try to fit in?
Anyways, I don't wanna be a baseball suit,
I don't want the helium in your balloon
I'm the dude bulldozing over second base
If you're lucky, when you find me, I'll still have a face
It won't matter much to me,
But the men on my TV
All wish I had that neon suit, anyways
Underwood typewriters and lame guitars
One of my old friends likes to sing on Mars
She's got lunch meat made of self control
Crouched over a vegan toilet bowl
When she wanted to get up,
They had to stop the truck
I never thought she'd ask me to stay, anyways.
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10. |
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I love the air from the lake
In Cleveland, life is always great
But I was most alive in Ft. Wayne, Indiana
On that Saturday in June, 2017
If you ever find yourself in Ft. Wayne, Indiana
Here's a list of all the things you've gotta do
Walk into the bar, get a jar of PBR
Or maybe three, see a rockstar, and listen to your heart
That's what we call the Ft. Wayne Blues
The one thing I remember well
Is my first whiff of that Detroit smell
But there's no smell like the rain in Ft. Wayne
With no umbrella, walking down the road at 2 AM
If you ever find yourself in Ft. Wayne, Indiana
Here's a list of all the things you've gotta do
Walk into the bar, get a jar of PBR
Or maybe three, see a rockstar, and listen to your heart
That's what we call the Ft. Wayne Blues
How could I ever pick a part
of Columbus - where would I even start?
But I left my heart back in Ft. Wayne, Indiana
On a bridge, on the river, in the park
If you ever find yourself in Ft. Wayne, Indiana
Here's a list of all the things you've gotta do
Walk into the bar, get a jar of PBR
Or maybe three, see a rockstar, and listen to your heart
That's what we call the Ft. Wayne Blues
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Fall doesn't have to end just because your nagging calendar tells you so. Just crank these new tunes by Dani House and Andrew Kovaleski, masterfully crafted to keep you basking in the season for almost 40 minutes! So lounge in a leaf pile in your room, shut the blinds to keep out any other season trying to taint the view from your windows, and fall in love with Fall is For Falling In Love.
Critics are already raving:
"This isn't ACTUALLY vegan is it?" - The NRA
"The best thing literally ever." - David Duchovny
"I actually did fall in love with it, in fact I MADE love to it!" - All of your friends
